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28 July 2016 @ 08:13 pm
Krissy is loaning me a book on ADD that her therapist loaned her. She thinks I may see myself in it (*grin*).

Yeah, okay, a lot of my early life reads like dealing with exactly these issues constantly, but with enough cover that I could get away with it. I've worked really hard to make sure I have lots of slack in my jobs, personal relationships and hobbies to work incredibly intensely and then not at all, and for it to average out okay. I have a huge number of coping habits for my impulsiveness. My classwork reads *exactly* like this, with the understanding that I was smart enough to get away with way more of it than was actually a good idea, even at CMU.

And while I've always hit caffeine pretty hard, it was a few years ago when I worked for Ooyala that I seriously started caffeinating regularly, on a schedule, fixed dose in the morning on the way to work followed by specific re-ups during the day... And hey presto, that was the same time I wrote my book, added side-jobs that made money, organized a lot of home stuff...


Well, okay then.

Which, me being me, leaves me with the question, "would Ritalin or something be even *better* for me than caffeine that way?" This is, naturally, not quite the right question.

(Also? Apparently stimulant medications such as Ritalin/Adderall/caffeine share a lot of in-brain mechanisms with adrenaline release, suggesting a strong link between stimulant use and being an adrenaline junky. Which, um, sounds a *lot* like an explanation of my parties, dating life and/or social drama.)
Lianafyfer on July 29th, 2016 05:47 pm (UTC)
When I started taking Wellbutrin, which is mostly used as an antidepressant but is also a lightweight ADHD treatment, I instantly, completely stopped wanting or needing coffee. It was fascinating. (Problem is, I love the flavor of coffee, so I really miss it. But if I drink it now, bad things happen.)
meganmh75 on August 14th, 2016 03:03 am (UTC)
That sucks. I love coffee, and my coffee habit has more to it that caffeine addiction. Its always hard for me to find a suitable replacement when I don't want the caffeine.
Kathleen by daykarenbynight on July 31st, 2016 08:08 pm (UTC)
Should you be interested, I have some thoughts on this that I am totally unwilling to share on unlocked livejournal. Hit me up on my standard gmail account, maybe?
meganmh75 on August 14th, 2016 03:02 am (UTC)
I think about this, too. Sometimes being so functional feels like it has been an overall negative for me.