"The ladies won't be able to keep their hands off you this week, thanks to a sharp new look consisting of tailored suits made from bubble wrap."
And from Brezsny:
"Each year the science magazine, "Annals of Improbable Research," awards "Ig Nobel Prizes" to imaginative eccentrics. A prize in chemistry was once given to researchers who discovered that romantic infatuation is biochemically indistinguishable from obsessive-compulsive disorder; other prizes have gone to the "Stalin World" amusement park, software that can detect a cat walking on a computer keyboard, and a report on "Courtship Behavior of Ostriches Towards Humans Under Farming Conditions." If it were up to me, Gemini, I'd give you an Ig Nobel Prize for what you're about to do, which will fulfill one of the main criteria for winning: pulling off an entertaining feat that first makes people laugh, then makes them think."